According to filings in the civil action that Sean Swain’s counsel filed against Ohio prison officials, ODRC Counsel Trevor Clark, commonly known to the world as Trainwreck Trevor, was the “agency liason” to FBI as prison officials subjected Sean to torture. A regimen of state terror was imposed on Sean in response to Sean’s “anarchist” writings and his “ideology.” Also, when those same prison officials selectively blocked Sean’s video visits with Ben Turk, their attorney, “Beerbong Tommy” Miller of the Ohio Attorney General’s State-Terror Defense Bureau, indicated that the Fuckweasel Bozos of Ineptitude were investigating Sean… again. State fascists deflected blame to the FBI.

Sean’s counsel accepted the plausibility of this explanation because the FBI has revealed that they have at least 1,297 pages of investigative files generated on Sean since his imprisonment.

In order to get to the bottom of the matter, Sean put the phone numbers of the FBI into his phone list in the hopes that the FBI would approve Sean to call them. “I even intended to pre-pay for any calls,” Sean said. “It wouldn’t cost them anything.”
But, curiously, the FBI would not permit Sean to call them.

“If the Fuckweasel Bozos of Ineptitude really wanted to investigate, I can’t think of an easier way to do it than to accept a pre-paid call from me and ask me questions. They could even record the conversation,” Sean said. “But they won’t even talk to me. They got a robo-call from Global Tel*Link and immediately hid under their desks. Ridiculous.”

If YOU want to know why the Fuckweasel Bozos of Ineptitude are hiding under their desks and avoiding Sean’s calls, call them and ask! The Cleveland Field Office can be reached at (216) 522-1400. The Columbus Field Office can be contacted at (614) 224-1183.

“We’re going to run out of trees if they keep hiding under their desks and generating thousands of pages of files rather than just talking to me,” Sean said. “We gotta do something. These shitheads have chopped down whole forests to document my activities. We’re running out of trees.”

* * *

AN OPEN LETTER TO FUCKWEASEL BOZOS OF INEPTITUDE

Dear Fuckweasels,

You can crawl out from under your desks. I don’t really have any super-powers.

I want to call and speak with you, but you won’t approve my request to call. Please be advised, I’ll spring for the costs.
What I want to know is, whether Trainwreck Trevor, who orchestrated the state-terror program to shut me up, was your wind-up toy… your sock puppet. I’m trying to get to the bottom of this, who it is that keeps ordering these childish harassments– trying to criminalize my criticism of JPay… block my radio participation… steal my emails… keep me from generating video.
State fuckweasels keep pointing at YOU. They keep blaming YOU.

And I STILL haven’t gotten the 1297 pages of files you admit to have.

This is all looking pretty shady. I hope you don’t force my attorney to depose you and subpoena your communications with Trainwreck Trevor and follow the white rabbit down your rabbit hole.

But, we can go there.

If you’re behind the shenanigans, knock it off. This won’t end well for you.

I’m going to put your numbers back into my phone list. When you get the robo-call, approve me to call you– if you’re not hiding anything. And turn over the 1297 pages of nonsense you said I could get. Stop acting like fuckweasels (as if…).

Freedom or Death,

Sean Swain

(the anarchist prisoner whose intellectual underwear you’ve been sniffing for several years…)